Sunday, July 24, 2011

A two-wheeled menace

So I was told, in no uncertain terms, by my darling little sister that I am in desperate need of a blog post that doesn't revolve around food. I personally happen to disagree, but to humor her for the moment I've decided to play along. I wasn't really sure what I was going to write about, but as I was driving back from Target today I saw something that for whatever irrational reason ALWAYS irritates me. Start Seeing Motorcycles, pasted onto the back of a minivan. I have to be honest with you here, I wasn't aware that I ever stopped seeing them. They are decidedly difficult to miss whilst cruising down the road, three or four abreast in a line that seems to be about six bikes long, spaced out perfectly so there is no room to pass. Clever clever move motorcyclists. I appreciate your need to not only be seen, but to hog the road on your "hog" as well. Now before anyone gets their panties in a bunch about this, I want to make it clear that I understand that these stickers are alerting and reminding drivers to be aware of motorcycles on the road and to make sure that they are not the victims of careless drivers in much bigger, enclosed vehicles. I get it. I want people to be safe, and being safe also requires some of you not to drive like ginormous turds. Including those of you who chose two wheeled modes of transportation. I don't get to buddy up with KIA souls and ride two abreast in freakishly large packs, even though I would secretly love to.


And since we're on the topic of two-wheeled modes of transportation, lets discuss another one of my personal favorites, people who bike AGAINST traffic. You have got to be kidding me. This, more than almost anything else, makes me so angry and baffled. You are more likely to be hit! How difficult is that to understand? When you decide to bike against traffic, you are moving towards traffic, which means that the approach is much faster, giving both yourself and the driver less time to react should something go wrong. And when you add that up, the odds are suddenly no longer in your favor, are they? Not to mention you generally look like a fool. It always blows my mind when I'm driving down the highway, minding my own business and lo and behold, there is a pedal biker, cruising against traffic on the side of the road. You make people nervous, you should stop. Don't be that guy.

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